Edit 55: On Privilege, Contribution, and Perception
A month after watching a pretty aggressive conversation unfold on Threads, I found my thoughts returning to it now and again, considering the topic: foreigners living in Japan. The mention of privilege (and the abuse of it) was a large part of a steadily growing argument.
This is a subject that’s become an increasing source of tension in certain pockets online, and it is, ironically, in part because of social media.
At the time I considered offering my own perspective—not because I wanted to argue with anyone, God forbid, but because I felt there was an important layer missing from the conversation. In the end, though, I chose not to. There was a certain amount of nuance that could have easily been mistaken for defending behavior I would never condone, and even in the most generous of spaces, social media isn’t always a pace where complexity is given room to breathe.
But I continued thinking back to this conversation because for me, I knew this it wasn’t really about expats living in Japan. It was about something much larger.
It was about how easily we confuse privilege with character.
When we lived in Japan, we arrived through my husband’s work assignment. We were undeniably privileged. Our housing (which we got to chose from numerous options) was provided. Our children’s tuition was covered. Medical appointments? Also covered. Flights home were paid for. During the pandemic, when Japan’s borders were closed, our daughter was still able to travel between the United Stated and Japan because we’d retained residency from our earlier years living there. Those were all opportunities created by our circumstances.
These haven’t been difficult things to acknowledge. Each being parts of the whole picture they’re facts, and they matter.
At the same time, these privileges never meant we were exempt from contributing to our new home. My husband’s job supported the Japanese side of the company and created opportunities for others. We paid taxes, supported local businesses. We travelled across the country to learn more about the culture and the different prefectures.We built lasting friendships, volunteered in different capacities, learned the language as best we could, and became a part of a community that profoundly changed our lives for the better.
Privilege didn’t remove our contributions, nor did our contributions remove our privilege.
Because what I understood is that privilege doesn’t necessarily define you as a person, but the opportunities you were given. Everything after that is about choice and character.
Some people are privileged and exploit it, others don’t really notice it. And some spend their lives trying to give something meaningful back because of it.
This is why I feel these conversations can become challenging. When responding to a broad topic, we are all coming from different experiences while assuming—to a degree—they are the same. “Foreigners living in Japan” isn’t one singular story. Neither is immigration or living as an expat. Every experience is unique, carrying its own set of circumstances, responsibilities, opportunities, and if you’ve ever made any type of move, challenges.
For me, acknowledging privilege has never felt like it took away from what our family gave back. If anything, it deepened my sense of responsibility. Gratitude isn’t just acknowledged by what you’ve been given, but asking what you’ll do with it.
And I still find myself thinking about it. Not as an answer I’ve landed on, but as a promise I continue to make.
